Jill and Kevin's Wedding Entrance

Jill and Kevin got married last week in Saint Paul, Minnesota, but it wasn't your normal everyday type of wedding. They didn't even walk down the aisle.

Instead they danced down it. Their wedding "dance" has been a big hit in video circles and they have even been on the Today Show because of it. Take a look.



As an Irishman, I will take any excuse to party, and weddings and funerals often make the best parties. I do not believe that Jill or Kevin are Irish, but you could have fooled me.

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Why did Britney Spears Lose Her Kids?

Why did Britney Spears lose her kids?

In case you have not heard, Los Angeles Superior Court Commissioner Scott Gordon ruled on Monday that Britney must turn custody of her two children, Sean and Jayden, over to her ex-husband, Kevin Federline.

The reason why Britney lost her kids is hardly earth shaking. She lost them because she did not obey the judge's orders.

In previous court appearances, Britney was ordered to obtain a valid California drivers license and to be tested randomly for drug and alcohol use.

Britney knew about the court orders, and her lawyer knew about the orders. In fact, most of the general public knew about the court orders because they were so widely reported in the media.

Yet Britney showed up in court on Monday untested and without a license.

The court Commissioner had no choice. He had to show Britney that he is the boss--what he says goes.

So he awarded full custody of the two kids to Kevin.

Guess what Britney did right after her court session? She applied for a California drivers license.

Well, at least she is learning. It appears that losing her kids has made some impact on the singer.













She is also learning how to exit an automobile. The above photo on the left is the notorious shot of Britney leaving an automobile while not wearing any undies. The next photo is Britney exiting her car on Monday.

Notice the difference?

It appears that the Brit is not quite as dumb as she appears to be because she has at least learned how to cover herself up.

But if it takes Britney this long to learn such basic rules of life, she is going to be learning many of life's lessons the hard way.

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Britney Spears Pays Off K-fed, Linsay Lohan Quits Showbiz

Britney Spears will or will not lose her child custody battle on Monday: take your pick. The predictions are all over the map on this one. Australia's Herald Sun newspaper is reporting that a "secret witness" is scheduled to testify on Monday about Ms. Spears' drug use in front of her children.

That type of testimony would surely sway most courts. However, other reports state that Britney and Kevin have already reached an out of court agreement that would allow Britney to retain her current custody rights of 70/30 (Britney gets custody 70% of the time). All she has to do is pay K-fed a mere $2 million to drop the custody case.

Those reports indicate that Kevin has already agreed to the deal although the ink on the contract is barely dry.

The Associated Press is running with the story that K-fed's lawyer has petitioned the court to permanently seal all custody court documents to keep the prying media away from the truth.

My money is on the money aspect of this case. The $2 million settlement is probably the most likely because that is the way it is with the American judicial system.

Anyone who has been to court in the US knows that the party spending the most money usually wins. Keven may see the dollar signs and give it all up for the 2 mil.

What? Me? Cynical? Why would you think that?

****

The latest on Lindsay Lohan is provided by her father, an admitted alcoholic and drug abuser himself. Michael Lohan, who had been estranged from his daughter, Lindsay, for three years, has now reconciled with Lindsay.

He is reporting that she intends to stay in rehab for another two-three months to be sure that she has the monkey off her back permanently this time.

Michael also says that Lindsay intends to give up show business and her Mercedes for the time being and concentrate on her current hobbies like mucking up horse manure and gardening. The elder Lohan stated that Lindsay wants to move away from the Hollywood types that influenced her into drinking and drugging too much--the type of people who are bad for her.

If Lindsay is still blaming her addictions on her choice of friends, do you really think she is cured? I had heard that an important part of rehab was the willingness to take responsibility for your actions rather than blaming your addiction on others.

But what do I know?

I know that I would have a hard time opting for manure mucking and gardening over a Mercedes. It sounds like ol' Lindsay could really use some extra time in rehab because she still does not seem to be placing the blame for her troubles where the blame really lies--with herself and the choices she makes.

But she can afford to take another 2-3 months off. She earns just a tad above the minimum wage, doesn't she?

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Britney Spears Update: Child Abuse, Gasless and Pantless

Here are the latest rumors on Britney Spears:

The Times of India, TMZ.com and eontarionow.com are all reporting that Britney Spears is under investigation for possible child abuse by the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services. The allegations are poor dental hygiene and poor eating and sleeping habits.

The Times reported that "Spear’s lawyer Dennis Wasser appeared at an unscheduled hearing on Tuesday morning in LA County Superior Court’s dependency section, which handles child abuse claims."

TMZ.com also reported that Britney is earning over $737,000 per month, as reported in her child custody case with her ex-husband, Kevin Federline.

SFGate.com, along with other outlets reported that Britney ran out of gas in Beverly Hills on Tuesday, and the local police pushed her car to the gas station.

Britney was also recently pulled over by the local gendarme for speeding, but was let off with a warning.

And our Brit was caught once again by the paparazzi sans undies as shown here.

It seems that the stories are coming in so fast on Miss Brit that one can barely keep up with them. The no panties photo once again will do little to help her image during her custody battle with Kevin.

What self-respecting judge is not going to listen when the mother of two is photographed topless and bottomless so frequently. One would think that Britney is trying to lose custody of her children on the basis of her recent behavior.

Naturally, most proper mothers shave their heads, spend time in rehab, get filmed crashing their cars into Mercedes, and expose their private regions to the paparazzi on a regular basis.

Of course, the paparazzi are now going to follow Britney even more because she is their meal ticket. Get a photo of Britney involved in one of her public gaffes and you do not have to work for several months.

Britney's behavior is so bizarre that one would think she wants to be caught behaving foolishly.

Perhaps she does.

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Britney Spears - Mother of the Year?

Is it really possible that Britney Spears could be named Mother-of-the-Year? Stranger things have happened, but the smart money is not on ole Brit' to win this one.

It is far more likely that even Ms. Spears would see this for what it truly is--a nightmare.

Speaking of nightmares, have you heard one of the latest rumors about Britney? It is being reported all over the 'net that Britney and her assistant, Shannon Funk, were caught kissing in the swimming pool together and Britney was topless.

OK! magazine just published a photo that is supposedly the smoking gun. The photo shows Britney kissing Shannon on the cheek and groping Shannon's breast.

Because of that, OK! is labeling Britney both a lesbian and bisexual.

Britney and Shannon are both denying there is any truth to the labels, but this type of publicity only strengthens Kevin Federline's attempt to win custody of their two children, Sean and Jayden.

It appears that Britney needs attention so badly that she will do anything to get it, including sabotaging the custody battle for her sons.

Aah, Britney--poor girl.

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Britney Spears Could Lose Her Kids

Britney Spears erratic and irresponsible behavior has given her ex-husband, Kevin Federline, a reason to petition the court for full custody of their two children, Sean and Jayden. Federline did just that on Thursday, petitioning the court for full custody. If the judge grants Federline’s request, Britney could lose her shared custody of her sons.

Britney has been in rehab earlier this year for alcohol addition, plus she has had negative publicity recently when she rammed her Mercedes into another vehicle (see the video) and when a story surfaced that she had engaged in a middle of the night groping incident in a public hotel swimming pool with one of the extras from her recent video shoot.

The photo below shows when one of the paparazzi caught Britney sans underwear as she exited her vehicle. The incident reinforced the public perception that Britney seems continually to make poor decisions.

People magazine is reporting that "Kevin is worried Britney is exposing the boys to unnecessary risk. His lawyer hopes to get Kevin primary custody."

Spears and Federline’s divorce was recently finalized in late July; however, Kevin only reluctantly signed the final papers because he was concerned with Spears recent erratic behavior.

Any judge that does not at least seriously consider Federline’s custody request would be acting irresponsibly because Britney has publicly proven that she is not always capable of wise judgment. News reports regarding Britney have been full of immature behavior on the singer’s part.

Her behavior may now come back to bite her.

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